All cricketers are idiots; ask Dale Steyn

By John Cheeran
People believe all cricketers are idiots. They are not so, if you go by what South African bowler Dale Steyn said the other day in Durban.
Steyn is the first cricketer to nail the lie that surrounds the Twenty 20 Indian Premier League.
IPL is all about money. We knew it all along. So is all life. So what’s the big deal, and what’s the surprise?
The surprise is that none was wiling to say so.
People talked about how IPL and Twenty20 were redefining cricket, and how given enough time, it would eclipse all other sport in global popularity chart.
Meanwhile someone was finding the busty cheer girls
offensive, and their gyrations obscene. But money was not obscene; it was Lakshmi, and it was quit okay.
Now allow me to quote Steyn on the phenomenon of IPL.
“The IPL was only four overs a game and it was like a paid holiday; you only had to work hard if you felt like it, which is probably why we finished second-last."
More truthful words were never spoken concerning cricket.
Indeed, it was paid holiday for Steyn and other mercenaries from South Africa who added up to make Bangalore Royal Challengers, one of the bottom-rung finishers in the IPL.
(I’m sure the king of good times Vijay Mallya would have told about Steyn’s paid holiday in India.)
Now the thing is that, can’t the truth about IPL be applicable in Fifty 50 one-dayers and in that dowdy Test matches as well?
In Test matches, though it lasts five days, half the time you are sleeping in the dressing room because your side is batting. And while fielding you don’t bowl more than 15 overs in a day. You can go out and relax in the dressing room, if you have the right excuse. Food and beverages are free also.
And what about rain delays and wet outfields?
And after five days you have the honourable option of holding your heads high, though you were completely outplayed, thanks to the draw.
So the paid holiday works there as well.
But what saddens me is that Steyn eventually chose to plead idiocy and take back his truthful words, brainwashed by some public relations experts.
Truth is bad for cricket, the PR guys have convinced
the callow South African fast bowler.
So Steyn returned to where he started.
“I am an idiot,” says Steyn.
Yes, we know, poor South African boy.
All cricketers are idiots.
And what about those who watched the IPL matches?
I can’t wait for the second edition of the Lalit Modi show.